Monday, March 16, 2009


Too tired to synthesize full paragraphs:

Home for a week
- preemptive fear of explosive arguements
- surprising twist: parents seem to have accepted the fact that I am an adult
- atmosphere surprisingly normal, relaxed, low stress
- immense sense of relief
- normal, rational convos with parents
- acceptance of Master and my South Africa trip this summer (good, I can start getting excited)
- acceptance, even (dare I say) excitement (?) re: our proposal/marriage timeline
- even greater sense of relief

Random ailments
- Stress, bad night time nausea and stomach pains
- lack of sleep
- general fatigue, feelings of crappiness
- today, also vaginal itching and stinging with peeing
- Master playing with me worsens itching/burning/pain
- On inspection, Master notes bumps, redness, white discharge
- yeast infection
- I am annoyed and cranky

- I am needy and whiny and bratty
- not feeling very submissive at all
- simultaneously feeling guilty
- feel like recently, I've just been taking and taking from him
- realize more and more how amazing Master is to me
- feel even guiltier for being so useless

Time to sleep. Slight fever, exhausted

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